Male Hiking Partner

Let's get one thing right out into the open in this discussion of having a male hiking partner. This guy falls squarely into the "no romance or possibility thereof" category. There's no sexual chemistry, no undercurrent, no daydreaming along the lines of "what if?". This is a friends-buddies-brother type of guy. If you want a few ideas on hiking with a significant other, this isn't the page.

So let's get down to it. You have a guy trail buddy, someone who has a bigger testosterone:estrogen ratio than you do, and therefore has stronger muscles and a larger body mass. That means he can probably out-hike you in terms of elevation gain, but not necessarily in terms of endurance. His stride length is longer. His pack is heavier. His muscles can keep going while yours are exhausted from a long pull uphill. [Please forgive me if your male hiking partner is not up to your physical prowess on the trail. I'm only speaking of the likely scenario here.]

There are varying levels of ability on the trail, that's just a fact. Two women hiking together may be wildly mismatched. But when you're hiking with a guy, at least in my experience, you should EXPECT to be a bit mismatched. I can only speak for myself, but I've noticed that I have better balance and more endurance over the course of a long day, especially on steep snowy slopes, than my male hiking partners. And I must concede the fact that the guys I've hiked with can charge up the trail much more quickly, and can log double digit miles each day without complaint.

Onto another topic: You want a clear-headed, experienced, enthusiastic, and reliable hiking partner with a strong skill set. The same goes for a female hiking partner, right? But be prepared for the fact that a guy's version of enthusiasm and yours might not sync up on every hike. It just goes with the gender territory.

Which brings up the delicate matter of communication.

For your own safety and comfort, you should be hiking with a male who checks in with you about how you're doing, if you're ready for a rest break, if the steep slope you're hanging onto by your ankles is getting a bit tedious. Not every five minutes, of course. But a check-in once in a while is greatly appreciated.

You should also be hiking with a guy who won't take unnecessary risks, as in "The water is only up to my thighs, let's go!" Or my all-time favorite: "It's only thundering a little bit."

And should it even have to be mentioned? You should be on the trail with a man who is not out to prove anything in terms of how quickly he can gain the summit, how far he can hike in one day, how long he can last without a water break. Those kinds of people, male or female, are just not worth your trail time.

So what keeps an opposite-gender hiking relationship strong?

A good sense of humor, lack of ego, ability to see things from a different perspective, willingness to lead or be led, and the freedom to speak your mind without feeling stupid or wimpy. And taking turns bringing cookies.

Here's the bonus pay-off in hiking with a guy trail buddy: there's ample opportunity to push yourself just a little bit, or a lot. A guy may be more willing to go off-trail and work on backwoods navigation skills. Or may see things along the trail that escaped your notice entirely. Or may have a bit more gas left in his legs at turn around time, and can entice you to ramble over "just one more" boulder pile to see what you can see.

What I'm getting at here is that it's nice to stay within your comfort zone, but it's also nice to be challenged. You get to define the limits of the challenge, and there should be no loss of face, or squashed ego, if you say "No thanks!" to the suggestion of taking a few dicey steps of exposure in order to gain a summit.

I'm not suggesting that females can't challenge each other on the trail. That's not the point here. Sharing trail time with a guy can open doors to new skills, new ways of seeing, new meaning to your mental definition of "long hike", "hard hike", "normal elevation gain", and other hiking benchmarks which define you as a hiker. My strength and endurance have improved a lot from hiking with guys.

If your experience with a male hiking partner differs from mine, I'd love to hear about it. I'm also interested in your examples of male/female disconnect on the trail (I've already shared 2 of mine). Email me using the contact form below.

A male hiking partner has advantages, but maybe you want to consider other types of hiking partners.